Welcome to Missoula, Where the Players Play

This is going to be a long, long entry but I have to get some of this stuff down before I forget it.

Thanks for all the writing compliments! I’ll keep trying to make it entertaining. And Sasha, at least the bibimbap (whatever that is) is being put to good use!

Amount of money spent on bike clothing: $470

So, you’ve probably noticed from the pictures that I’m not exactly wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt while riding cross country. There’s a whole world of bike clothing out there, all specifically designed to make you look foolish. I decided I’d start this entry by giving you the inside scoop on what my wardrobe has been like for the past three weeks. Fascinating, I know.

For my lower half, I wear skin-tight chamois bike shorts that cost $90 apiece. I own three pairs of them. For my top, I wear a skin-tight jersey that shows off every peak and valley of my rippling muscles. I own three of those, too. I have two pairs of wool socks that never, ever seem to get wet. I wear each outfit for three days and do laundry around every seven or eight days. I do my laundry in Laundromats or if I’m lucky in some kind, gentle person’s home. I’ve come to realize that with these skin-tight, neon outfits I either look like I’m from the future, about to go to ballet class or a gymnast, none of which bode well for me in rural America.

For instance: I decided to get dinner one night at this place called The Outpost in John Day, Oregon. I ate, paid my bill and got up to leave. As I was walking out of the restaurant, I noticed there were at least eight tables filled with truckers. All of them were staring at me. I’m a little leery of truckers as it is, not to mention when dressed in neon spandex, so I hurried on my way. But when I reached the door, a couple named Troy and Mel quickly spotted me as a fellow Transamerica rider. We got to talking and I ended up sitting down with them while they ate, right in the middle of all the truckers. So, you know, that was fine, I could deal with that. There was safety in numbers. But when I looked to my left, I saw an old, crooked toothed man staring directly at me. He had a big grin on his face and so did some of his friends. There was something seriously off about how they were eyeing me. To calm myself down, I continued talking to Troy and Mel who were really fun, dynamic people. They told me all about their trip and gave me some helpful advice for the road. It was great.

Then I decided to make an off-hand comment about the truckers. Mel informed me that those weren’t truckers; they were inmates. And they were blatantly checking me out.

Suddenly I didn’t want to move from my seat. My butt was a shining beacon. I thought: “Holy shit.”

I drink a lot of water on this trip and it always seems like I have to pee at the most inopportune times. And of course, this was one of those times. I excused myself and ran like a little girl to the men’s room. When I got there, it felt like I stepped onto the set of OZ. There were inmates everywhere. Like bees. Big, hairy, convicted felon bees. I stepped up to the urinal, aware that my supple and exposed butt cheeks might tense at any moment during the pee and incite a riot. Nothing happened, but that didn’t stop me from not washing my hands and basically running back to our booth. Phew.

Everything was fine after that— we finished our drinks and left— but big yellow buses have had their meaning altered for me forever.

Digression: prisons should really consider converting to liquid soap. Wouldn’t that solve a lot of problems? But maybe I’m missing the point.

In any case, that’s the end of that story.

I realized I need to start dedicating a section of my blog to the awesome people that I meet. So I did. It’s called “Interesting People and Amazing Hospitality”. By no means can I get them all in one entry, so consider this the first installment of many.

Some Interesting People and Amazing Hospitality:

Glenn Breeding:
Glenn Breeding is a man who has been walking the same stretch of land every day for 20 years. He always carries a bag with him and picks up trash on the side of the road. He is short, cherubic and old. He caught my eye while I was riding up Ochoco Pass. He was a neat guy.

Angel:
Angel let me stay at her place when I was passing through Kooskia, Idaho. I met her in a restaurant where she was serving food. Somewhere in our banter she slipped in that her baby’s daddy had been missing for months and had recently been found dead near Humboldt, California. This was a little shocking to hear. I asked her to explain exactly what happened. Apparently, her boyfriend of many, many years turned into a druggie and started pawning off all of her and her son’s belongings to sustain a habit/pay off debts. She ended up leaving him and going on the run. He pursued her for months before she finally agreed to let him see their son for one last time. They set a date and decided to meet in Iowa. He never showed. Then the police found him buried in someone’s backyard.

It’s a pretty shocking, disturbing story, especially when you consider how bubbly and friendly Angel is.

Later on, she showed me an atlas with all of the states and cities she had lived in. There was a circle in every state. Aside from all that, she had a cool new boyfriend that liked good music and sold his own brand of Barbecue sauce. I hung out with them and the sister of the infamous ex-boyfriend that night. I noticed that everything was an ash tray for those people.

There is a photo of Angel and her new boyfriend, John, in the Idaho album.

Side note: one of the bars we went to used to be an old Speakeasy. The bartender showed us the old gambling rooms and caves where they hid alcohol. How cool is that?

Another side note: right before I met Angel, a woman selling vegetables from her garden gave me a free cucumber. Her name was Sarah Johnson. It’s interesting how some people give you their full names when you meet them. And then hand you a cucumber.

Unnamed Biker Guy:
I met unnamed biker guy at Lolo Pass coming out of a restroom. During his stint in the Air Force he had been to over 36 countries across the seven continents and had been in a number of horrible crashes. He was about to get his second knee completely replaced. I wish I could have talked to him longer but I get burned out meeting people all the time and decided to leave.

The Prineville Firefighters:
These were some of the coolest dudes and dudettes that I’ve met so far. I remember rolling into Prineville and not having any contacts, scared that I wasn’t going to find a place to sleep that night. I had recently decided to stop paying for lodging (which I’ll explain at some point) and had heard that Fire Stations were generally pretty friendly to bikers. I worked up some courage and rode up to the station. I saw firefighters doing firefighter things, like rolling hoses and talking beside big red trucks. When I got closer, I noticed a patch of grass near the back of the station that looked perfect for camping. I expected to get turned down, but instead was met with a very warm reception. Far from simply letting me pitch a tent on the grass, they offered me a bed in their dorm and basically made me an honorary firefighter for a night. They let me hang out with them, share their dinner and watch TV on their sweet LA-Z-Boys. Also like a firefighter, I: learned how to clean fire hoses, mopped all the linoleum in the building and saved a baby from a raging fire. Their names were Wayne, Tim, Jeremy, Alicia, Andy and James and they were awesome people. There are a couple pictures of them in the Oregon photo album. Check it out.

There is so much stuff happening that I seriously can’t get all of it down. I’m exhausted. Here are some highlights:

1. I made it to Montana and I'm a week ahead of schedule!

2. More pictures! And they’re tagged! Here’s the link again: http://picasaweb.google.com/will.blank

3. I ran out of water while riding up an extremely long and desolate pass called White Bird in Idaho. I stuck my thumb out as a last resort and got picked up by Allie, Duncan and Duncan’s parents, Jean and Dan. They ended up letting me stay with them in Missoula for a couple days. Very cool folks. That kind of awesomeness is not easily forgotten.

4. I rode 84 miles in one day, all uphill, which is the longest I’ve done yet. Sweet!

5. I met a guy named Kevin in Council, Idaho and we ended up riding with each other up Lolo Pass. I just got back from hanging out with him in downtown Missoula and we may end up getting some breakfast before he heads to Canada. He brought a bag of cookies with him tonight and we used that to barter and get into all of the bars for free.

6. I think I’ve lost 10 pounds.

Anyway, hope to keep hearing from you guys. Thanks for reading.